Let's Change Things Up A Bit

While the majority of my posts (okay, so maybe all of them) have been about me ranting and venting about shit that pisses me off, this post is going to be much lighter, happier and positive. I'm in a good place mentally, and I feel like shouting that from the rooftops. Because let's be honest, that hasn't happened in a while.

First of all, I'd like to say that I completely own my mental illness. I am not ashamed of it one bit. Most of the time, when I'm in a good mental state of mind, I joke about it. Sometimes I joke that I should name my multiple personalities, because there are a few in there... haha. I know that it makes me do some crazy shit that I know I wouldn't do if I were mentally healthy. Sometimes, it makes me very, very angry at things that really shouldn't make someone mad. Sometimes I get so angry that I want to cause physical harm. 5 years ago I couldn't control that but now I'm proud to say I can. I just have to walk away. Other times, it allows me to let the shit roll right off my back. I honestly never who I will be from one day to the next. It's a toss of the coin and it has taken me years upon years to figure this all out. 

Maybe one day I will name them. The name Cruella comes to mind.. 

**Anywho, today I am in a good place. I've had a good day, the weather was nice and my son had a great first day at school. I feel at peace with everything I've gotten off my chest the past several days. I don't regret my latest blog entry. I was able to rid myself of these pent up secrets that I didn't want to carry anymore. It caused drama elsewhere with others but it's no longer my problem. I said what I wanted and needed to say and now I am FREE. And that is what matters. My personal life and mental health is what I have to look out for and I do not apologize for that.

That leads me to the very good in my life, the people I love and the things that make me happy. I have some of the greatest friends and family in the world. The people that truly love me have shown amazing support and I am so grateful for them. I would name everyone but I'd feel terrible if I unintentionally left someone out, but those of you know who you are and you truly mean the world to me. Thank you. I mean that. 

We have big changes coming soon and I am excited. The idea of being removed from the toxic environment I've been in for two and half years almost brings happy tears to my eyes. Moving will probably be the best therapy I could find. I'll miss the few friends I've made here but there's way to keep in touch. 

After re-reading this I see it's kind of all over the place. But with my mind, could you expect anything different? =)